Ask Your Question today. Its been almost a year since i had sex with my boyfriend.
We used to have sex all the time in the beginning of our relationship, now it seems like our sex life went down the drain, at least for me. He begs me to do it with him or give him something on the side bj's but i'm just never in the mood with him anymore.
He tries his heart out to try to get me in to have sex but i just can't. I'm not seeing anyone else nor have i have plans to do so. I love him very much and i never cheated on him. While there is a chemical outburst in the beginning of the relationship that makes you behave like rabbits, which eventually ebbs away, you should still have a regular sex drive.
It seems your libido has been put into a casket and thrown into a hole in the cellar. I assume you also never masturbate?
You should go and see your doctor about this. While a low libido may be normal, the total absence of any kind of libido is kind of unnormal for young females.
As for your boyfriend, unlike us, they have physical needs. If no sex or masturbation, nightly discharge. Their hormon levels increase and make them do pretty stupid stuff to get that release. So yeah, you are not really in the mood. I'm also not in the mood to go to work on monday morning. It may feel a bit weird and inconvenient to let him fuck you when you are not in the mood, but it will make him so incredibly happy.
And if you really love him, you will want to make him happy, see it as a regular gift only YOU can give to him. There's a good chance he will eventually look elsewhere if you deny yourself to him. Ruined the relationship too. We had both been under some strain in the relationship but this certainly didn't help. Make SURE he feels loved. Even if it's not through sex. Just make sure you show him you care and aren't losing interest in him emotionally.
Do NOT have sex to make someone else happy! That is the dumbest thing i've ever heard. Comparing sex to work on Monday.
If a guy has needs and you are not in the mood he can handle it on his own like a big boy. HE should care that you're not in the mood as well. Although yes, you wish you could just want to like he does, all the time. Go see a doctor, look in to it. Could be a simple fix. But do not ever make your self uncomfortable in that situation or you will not want sex even more than you don't want it now.
Perhaps I am a female and never in the mood him to work out more to work on his muscle tone. At least if you're still not turned on by him he has a chance of picking up a less boring girl? Plus if your stressed your labido will drop hugely! That he has to be careful and gentle, and foreplay with you alot. It's possible you want it, but you just don't know it.
If it's been a year then you should definately give this a try: I had a bit of a labido loss for different reasons, and I kinda had to ease myself back into it with the help of my boyfriend. Yes i agree with foreplay to get you in the mood.
It doesnt even have to be anything sexual. For me i get turned on wen y boyfrien makes me feel like a lady or just acts like a gentleman, so for me taking me to a nice dinner is like foreplay! You should explore the things you think would turn you on about him. Or maybe give you a message or something.
Another trick i use to get myself in the mood when im anticipating having sex is that i read literotica or watch some porn. That way im turned on by the time i see him ad he doesnt have to try too hard to get me on the mood, just how he likes it.
Men can see a half naked body an get turned on, but for girls it takes much, much more than that. You're supposed to say "Yeah why? I'm currently dealing with this but I'm the guy in the situation.
The mother of my 2 year old and my girlfriend of over 4 years hasn't been in the mood for over 6 months now.
I, like this other gentleman, have tried everything and even degraded myself to levels of begging. I don't cheat on her and she's the only one I've never cheated on. She was my best friend growing up so I committed completely and stayed true and now I am going through a whirlwind with her.
The worst part is she says she has no idea why she isn't in the mood which I have a very difficult time believing and now I have developed these insecurities about myself and I have I am a female and never in the mood all confidence in myself. I love her to death and obviously sex is not everything but it's pretty fucking important to sustaining a stress free foundation in the relationship.
Is she not happy with me? Is she not happy in general? Am I bad at sex? What more can I do? Questions upon questions stack up daily and it's taking over my life. I'm unhappy but trying.
Is there any hope? Are you on hormonal birth control? Dead in the water, no desire whatsoever. Could you be suffering from depression? I would get to a doctor, something isn't right. It could be a medical problem which you may want to check with your physician about.
Or you could have some repressed psychological issues which turn you off from your boyfriend. You may love him and if this is true you should respect his natural urges to have sex with you. Go to the chemist and get some lube, if you want go to the doctors and try some alternatives eg.
Yeah gotta agreeto love hims all nice and dandy but that doesn't mean you'll want him. Could be an attraction thing. If your BF wants sex and you don't want it, then just tell him no. If he throws a fit, come up with a aggrement. Sex only works if two partners want it. Personally i think its I am a female and never in the mood it. Now ive also dated someone in the past who couldnt get it up.
He wanted sex all the time and it would usually be like having sex with a bowl of jello. In that case i had completely lost my drive and stopped having sex with him. If you KNOW why youre not in the mood, then you really should address the problem. Otherwise you and your boyfriend really arent much more than close friends and you will eventually at some point find someone you are sexually attracted to and want out he was my favorite boyfriend but in the end sex was really a deal breaker, and i denied i to myself for a few years, just like you.
Either you will ventually need it from somewhere, or he will become so miserable that you wont have sex with him an it will drive him away. If youre just not "in the mood" i would definitely consider doing it anyway, hell i do it for my boyfriend a few times a week and I am a female and never in the mood really not THAT bad: I think that once you start doing it you feel like it feels good so you keep doing it and then afterwards you and him are both happier.