This site uses cookies. By continuing, your consent is assumed. Learn more

148.9fm shares

How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend


Jealousy is a natural emotion but it can hurt your relationships if it gets out of control.

Deal with your jealous feelings by figuring out where they come from and why they develop. Do your best to communicate openly with your partner to avoid misunderstandings and to reduce your feelings of insecurity. Enjoy being in love but make sure to take care of yourself and your emotional well-being as well.

Different counselors or therapists have different approaches to treating jealousy. Your counselor or therapist may or may not ask you to reconsider your long-held romantic beliefs.

This method really helps you...

Regardless, you may want to take this approach on your own to help you get over your jealousy. Your jealousy can come from a variety of sources, not just long-held romantic beliefs. Try to pinpoint the events and circumstances that founded your jealous feelings to determine the root of your jealousy. You should reflect on your beliefs about relationships so you can identify those that could be problematic.

If you can determine where those beliefs How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend from, you can work through them and then try to formulate more realistic ideas about relationships. Read on for another quiz question.

You should definitely be up front with your boyfriend about your jealous feelings. When you compromise, both parties agree to give and take some things to foster a sense of trust and cooperation. You should take time for yourself to boost your self-esteem and self-love, not to make anyone else upset.

You may become codependent on your partner if you feel like you need to spend all of your time with him. Spending time doing the things you enjoy can help you feel less jealous when your partner does things without you. Enjoying your alone time is a way to take time for yourself. Reader Approved Why choose wikiHow?

Because your jealousy isn't working...

Ways to Control Jealous Feelings. Try to pinpoint the root of your jealousy. Feeling jealous in a relationship does not necessarily mean that you are naturally an insecure person.

Try to isolate the point where your jealousy began, whether in your current relationship or a previous one. Consider the events and circumstances that surrounded it to understand the context in which it developed. Note if you feel jealous when your partner is around other females. Feeling jealous when your partner spends time with other women is likely a sign of insecurity.

The discomfort in this situation may come from a fear that your partner will be unfaithful, indicating a lack of trust. Ask yourself they have actually demonstrated this kind of behaviour in your relationship, or if you may be exhibiting a mild form of paranoia. Ask yourself if you get jealous when your partner talks about their ex. It can be difficult to hear about your partner's past relationships, but it's important to remember that these memories are a part of their history.

Ask yourself if you feel jealous because you feel inadequate compared to your partner's past loves. This may indicate a self-esteem issue that has nothing to do with your partner. Reconsider your long-held beliefs about relationships. Some assumptions that you make about how romantic relationships should be can give you unrealistic expectations. Reflect on your beliefs about relationships and focus on identifying ones that could be problematic. Consider where those beliefs came from and try to formulate more realistic ideas about being in a couple.

Unrealistic romantic ideals may come from sources like movies, television, and fairy tales. Speak to a counsellor or therapist to help resolve your jealous feelings. Through talk therapy, a counsellor or therapist can help you identify the triggers of your jealousy and develop coping mechanisms to avoid it. Find a specialist in your area and book an appointment to open up about your negative feelings.

Sharing your experiences openly may give you a new perspective about your relationship. To find a counsellor or therapist in the U. Method 1 Quiz What is the best reason to reconsider your long-held romantic beliefs? Because your counselor or therapist will ask you to. Because they are likely the root of your jealousy.

Because they are most likely incorrect. Because they may have resulted in unrealistic expectations. Be honest about your jealousy with your partner. Feelings of jealousy are more likely to get out of hand if you keep them secret.

Be upfront with your partner when you are feeling envious or insecure. Let How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend know that "How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend" are telling them about your jealousy so that you can get control over it in an honest and healthy way. For instance, say something like, "I'm feeling a bit insecure about you spending time with your work friends and not inviting me to join you, but I am trying to control my jealousy so it doesn't hurt our relationship.

Tell your partner what you need from your relationship with them. We can't expect a romantic partner to guess all of our needs and wants, so it is important to be upfront about things.

This method really helps you...

Outline your expectations and be clear about your limits. A lack of knowledge about your feelings may lead your partner to disappoint you unwittingly and leave you feeling unfulfilled. Whether or not they agree, it is best to be open about your feelings so they understand your reactions. Be clear with your partner How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend infidelity is a relationship deal-breaker for you.

Use "I" statements to communicate clearly with your partner. An "I" statement should briefly establish the situation, express the feeling you have about it, and state its effect on you. Use these statements as much as possible when communicating with your partner to facilitate an open dialogue. Practice active listening to show your partner empathy and understanding. Active listening involves being empathetic and receptive when your partner talks and letting them that know you are hearing them.

Listen carefully to what they say without interrupting. Check in with the person during pauses or after they are done talking to reiterate some of what they said to ensure that you understood them correctly. Work out compromises that make you both feel valued. Making demands of you partner without considering their feelings is bound to create tension in your relationship.

How to stop being jealous...

Help to foster a sense of trust and cooperation by offering solutions to problems that benefit both of you. This will show that you are taking their well-being into account while maintaining your own boundaries. Don't snoop on your partner to quell your jealousy. If you are uncertain enough about your partner to snoop on them, nothing that you uncover will How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend helpful to you.

Even if you find something that proves your partner to be untrustworthy, you will also be breaking their trust by violating their privacy. Fight the urge to check up on your partner by doing things like: Don't make social media the center of your relationship. Spending too much time on social media can cause jealousy and isolate you from your real-life relationship. How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend of portraying your relationship through posts and pictures on social media, focus on strengthening your connection with your partner.

Avoid communicating with them too much over social media, which can actually foster distance between the 2 of you in the long run. To tell your partner what you need from the relationship. To avoid assigning blame. To be upfront about your concerns. To work out a compromise. Remind yourself of your best qualities to boost your self-esteem. Low self-confidence can leave you vulnerable to feelings of inadequacy and jealousy. Boost your self-esteem by making a list of your strongest attributes, as expressed by others or evidenced in your achievements.

Emphasize these positive thoughts to ward off negative feelings about yourself. Enjoy your alone time. When relationships start to get co-dependent, one or both parties may feel inclined to spend all their time with their partner.

I've rounded up some tips...

Try to take time for yourself to do things that you enjoy on your own. Valuing your alone time will help you feel less jealous when your partner does things without you.

This method really helps you...

Pursue new interests and hobbies on your own. In healthy relationshipsboth partners have their own interests to pursue. This can help to reduce jealousy by keeping both parties occupied and fulfilled. To boost your self-esteem and protect your relationship, try an activity like: Avoid comparing yourself to your partner's former girlfriends. It is natural to think about how you compare to your partner's former loves, but overthinking this comparison can be harmful.

Remind yourself that former relationships are in the past for a reason and concentrate on the strength of your current relationship. Focusing on the past will allow it to overshadow your present happiness. Method 3 Quiz Why is it important to enjoy your alone time? So How to control your jealousy towards your boyfriend can make your boyfriend jealous.

Of course, if your partner is continually sexually active with other people, then jealousy So how can we start to break the jealousy cycle, reclaim self-control, and stop.

Right now, I can imagine an alien invasion headed right towards Earth. Whether you are the jealous partner or whether your spouse is the jealous one, irrational jealousy can eventually destroy your marriage.

News feed